Yesterday was a good day! One of the real down sides to this surgery/recovery is feeling so isolated. Since we live in such a remote location, miles from town with no close neighbors, and since I can't get out and about (and wouldn't really have wanted to in the weather we've had during much of my recovery time!), I rarely see anyone other than my husband. And he's out of town this week. So, in addition to having to do everything for myself, which is exhausting, I find myself with no one but the dog to talk to!
A friend came to visit yesterday. She brought lunch - yum! She brought her Rummikub game and we played - I won 2 out of 3! She caught me up on all the happenings in our church and around town. And when she left, she took my garbage!! Now that's a true friend......one who empties your smelly kitchen garbage can and takes it with her! Thanks, Jan!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
One Month Later......
Today is an anniversary of sorts. It's been one month since my ankle surgery. People often ask me how I'm feeling, if I'm in a lot of pain. The answer is, I feel great and have virtually no pain. Is hopping around on one foot annoying? Yes. Is it inconvenient? Yes. Will I be thrilled to have this cast off? Yes. Am I ready to get my life back? Yes.
But the reality is this......even my worst, most uncomfortable days since surgery (with the exception of the first 2 or 3 days) are better than my very best days before surgery. This is definitely a case of "I didn't realize how bad it was, I didn't know how bad I felt until I didn't feel that way anymore."
And for that I am very thankful. And looking forward to the day when I can walk on TWO feet :)
But the reality is this......even my worst, most uncomfortable days since surgery (with the exception of the first 2 or 3 days) are better than my very best days before surgery. This is definitely a case of "I didn't realize how bad it was, I didn't know how bad I felt until I didn't feel that way anymore."
And for that I am very thankful. And looking forward to the day when I can walk on TWO feet :)
Thursday, January 14, 2010
I had a meltdown today. Let me rephrase that.....I had a MAJOR meltdown today!! I knocked over my coffee. That would be bad enough.....a full cup of really good coffee spilled. That's terrible!! But it's not just that in my clumsiness I knocked it over. That it went everywhere.....all over the laptop and the TV remote (and all the other remotes in the remote control collection) and into the magazine basket and all over the stack of books and all over the little gismo that I need to transfer photos from camera to computer and all over the CDs and DVDs and all over my Bible and my Bible study notebook and all over my journal and completly washed out the grocery list I had just made for my husband. In other words, it went everywhere. That alone is enough for a meltdown.
But the major meltdown came because, in my current state of immobility, I couldn't reach all the places the coffee had reached. I couldn't even clean up my own mess. And that frustrated me beyond words........hence, the meltdown.
Fortunately, Al came up from the office while I was in mid-meltdown-mode, cleaned up the mess, wrapped his arms around me and let me know everything would be OK. It's a good thing he isn't out of town today......I might still be sobbing!
Is it any wonder I love this man??!!!
But the major meltdown came because, in my current state of immobility, I couldn't reach all the places the coffee had reached. I couldn't even clean up my own mess. And that frustrated me beyond words........hence, the meltdown.
Fortunately, Al came up from the office while I was in mid-meltdown-mode, cleaned up the mess, wrapped his arms around me and let me know everything would be OK. It's a good thing he isn't out of town today......I might still be sobbing!
Is it any wonder I love this man??!!!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
"To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven......"
(Ecclesiastes 3:1).
We've been studying the book of Ecclesiastes in our Sunday morning Bible Study and this is the passage we were focused on this past Sunday. It's a familiar passage, but one I keep turning over and over in my head this week. I think, based on my current circumstances, there should be a verse that says "a time to walk and a time to sit" or something like that! I'm in a state of mild frustration over my current immobility. I guess that is to be expected. It's been almost a month since surgery, I'm feeling good, I have no pain, but I still can't walk. I still have to wait.
I know it will be worth it. I am so looking forward to the day when I have no cast, and when I can walk on my own two feet without pain. It's been a long time since that was the case.....the walking without pain part, not the walking at all part. Right now all this is at worst mildly inconvenient when I think about all the things I wish I could do and can't. Or when I have to use a wheel chair or walker to get from point A to point B. Not only is that inconvenient, it's exhausting! I'm so very thankful that this is only a temporary condition!
And because it is only temporary, I should quit whining and just deal with it......and be thankful that it is temporary! At least the cast looks good.....it's pink!
(Ecclesiastes 3:1).
We've been studying the book of Ecclesiastes in our Sunday morning Bible Study and this is the passage we were focused on this past Sunday. It's a familiar passage, but one I keep turning over and over in my head this week. I think, based on my current circumstances, there should be a verse that says "a time to walk and a time to sit" or something like that! I'm in a state of mild frustration over my current immobility. I guess that is to be expected. It's been almost a month since surgery, I'm feeling good, I have no pain, but I still can't walk. I still have to wait.
I know it will be worth it. I am so looking forward to the day when I have no cast, and when I can walk on my own two feet without pain. It's been a long time since that was the case.....the walking without pain part, not the walking at all part. Right now all this is at worst mildly inconvenient when I think about all the things I wish I could do and can't. Or when I have to use a wheel chair or walker to get from point A to point B. Not only is that inconvenient, it's exhausting! I'm so very thankful that this is only a temporary condition!
And because it is only temporary, I should quit whining and just deal with it......and be thankful that it is temporary! At least the cast looks good.....it's pink!
Friday, January 8, 2010
Something to Think About
One of the things I've enjoyed doing lately is playing a game called Bejeweled Blitz on Facebook. I was playing this game before I had my recent surgery, but now that I have so much time on my hands I find myself playing more frequently. I've learned a couple of things playing this game. One is that one should not attempt to play this game immediately after taking a pain pill! A game that requires you to be observant and to respond quickly is much more difficult when those abilities have been somewhat impaired by Vicodin!!
But on a more serious note, I think I have learned a valuable spiritual lesson from this game. Now before you roll your eyes too much, let me explain. I noticed a few days ago that when the sound was turned all the way down on the computer while I play, I actually get better scores. You see, Bejeweled Blitz is a timed game, and as time begins to run out, the warning "sounds" are really creepy and for me, quite distracting. I discovered that when I don't pay any attention to the sound effects and just play the game, I actually do much better!
Maybe it's a stretch, but it illustrates for me the point of what the Apostle Paul was saying in Hebrews 12:1 ("lay aside every weight and the sin which so eagerly entangles us, and run with endurance the race set before us...."). As I'm playing the game, if I turn off the sound, if I don't let myself be distracted by the sound, then I am actually able to play the game better and with a better outcome. In the same way, in the "game" of life, if I set aside all the things that distract me from running with endurance the race God has set before me.....if I focus on the "race" instead of listening for the clock to count down.....then perhaps I will be able to play the "game" better and have a better outcome as well. Much like focusing on the effort rather than the results. Something to think about.....
But on a more serious note, I think I have learned a valuable spiritual lesson from this game. Now before you roll your eyes too much, let me explain. I noticed a few days ago that when the sound was turned all the way down on the computer while I play, I actually get better scores. You see, Bejeweled Blitz is a timed game, and as time begins to run out, the warning "sounds" are really creepy and for me, quite distracting. I discovered that when I don't pay any attention to the sound effects and just play the game, I actually do much better!
Maybe it's a stretch, but it illustrates for me the point of what the Apostle Paul was saying in Hebrews 12:1 ("lay aside every weight and the sin which so eagerly entangles us, and run with endurance the race set before us...."). As I'm playing the game, if I turn off the sound, if I don't let myself be distracted by the sound, then I am actually able to play the game better and with a better outcome. In the same way, in the "game" of life, if I set aside all the things that distract me from running with endurance the race God has set before me.....if I focus on the "race" instead of listening for the clock to count down.....then perhaps I will be able to play the "game" better and have a better outcome as well. Much like focusing on the effort rather than the results. Something to think about.....
Thursday, January 7, 2010
You've Come a Long Way.....
I recently reconnected via Facebook with a friend from childhood who commented, after viewing some of my photos on Facebook, that I had come a long way for a girl from Landrum. And that comment started me thinking. Although I now live less than a hundred miles from the town where I grew up, those years in Landrum seem lifetimes away. I guess it is true that I have come a long way!
Of course it's true that I have journeyed many, many miles from my upstate South Carolina home. And in the journeying, have been places I used to only dream of! As a little girl, I spent many hours in our little town library.....beginning with the Bookmobile that my mother used to take me to and then progressing to our tiny little town library that opened some years later. That library was open two days a week, and I was there every time......getting more books for my Granddaddy who lived with us (he only wanted westerns or mysteries and would complain loudly if I made the mistake of bringing home a book he had already read!!) and stocking up on biographies and Nancy Drew, Trixie Belden and the Bobbsey Twins, among other things, for myself. I probably read every book in that library at least once! And as I would read about faraway places, I would dream of the day.....some day......that I would be able to visit those places.
Meanwhile, Daddy's cousin Anne, who was a professor of Engish at Winthrop University (then it was Winthrop College, which is also my alma mater), would invite me to visit her during summer terms and would drop me off in the Children's Section of the college library while she taught. More books!! I was in heaven!! And more dreaming of places I hoped one day to visit! Anne would also occasionally travel to Europe during her summer vacations and would bring back souvenirs.....I had an Eiffel Tower and a Venetian gondola on my charm bracelet! And she would bring more books!!
Even as I was reading of all those faraway places and concocting all sorts of scenarios that would get me there, I don't know that I ever really believed I would actually travel like that. I think that somewhere deep inside, I knew that I was just dreaming.....that a shy little bookworm like me would never really get to visit all those places. But still I dreamed.
And then I grew up.....and got married, in what I still think was the most beautiful wedding ever, to a wonderful man. He was from "the big city" (Columbia, the capital city of our state) and we moved to the suburbs of the big city. I continued reading, taught high school English, and fully expected that we would live in Columbia forever. We used to watch "The Love Boat" on TV and dream together of the day we would take a cruise and I thought maybe that would be the way my travel dreams would be fulfilled.
But we didn't stay in Columbia forever. We have moved......a LOT!! My sweet husband, whose educational background is civil engineering and who worked in an architectural firm when we first married, took a job as a "building and grounds manager" for a large insurance company in the late '70s, following massive layoffs at the architectural firm. Part of that job involved being responsible for all the company's telephone equipment, which led him in 1984 to accept a position with an interconnect phone company in Charlotte, NC. Turns out he's really good at this telecommunications stuff, which has led to many other job offers that we couldn't refuse, which is how we've done all this moving around the country. He's very well-respected and sought after in the low-voltage data industry, which makes me very proud of him.
All the moving around has had its challenges. It's not easy to uproot your family, say good-bye to friends and your comfort zone and start over. But it really has been a wonderful life, in spite of the challenges! We have met so many wonderful people, made dear friends in so many parts of the country, and one of the great benefits has been the fulfillment of so many of my travel dreams!
We've experienced so much of the beauty and diversity that is the USA......from our native South Carolina to the rugged Rocky Mountains of Colorado, then to the shoreline of Connecticut (which I still believe is one of the most beautiful places on earth in the fall!), on to the "tundra" of Minnesota, to the sunshine of Florida, and now back almost full circle to the mountains of North Carolina just a short distance from where I grew up. Just in the moving around, we have journeyed many miles......."come a long way."
And in the journeying, we have visited so many of the places I once only dreamed of visiting.....and although I have never ridden (yet) in a Venetian gondola, I have been to the top of the Eiffel Tower! Paris is on my list of favorite cities.......along with London, Edinburgh, York, Montreal, Quebec City, Sydney, Melbourne, Zurich......I've come a long way!
Many of these cities I would love to visit again....and again and again. And I still have cities I would love to see.....quite a long list actually. I've come a long way, but I'm not done yet!
Of course it's true that I have journeyed many, many miles from my upstate South Carolina home. And in the journeying, have been places I used to only dream of! As a little girl, I spent many hours in our little town library.....beginning with the Bookmobile that my mother used to take me to and then progressing to our tiny little town library that opened some years later. That library was open two days a week, and I was there every time......getting more books for my Granddaddy who lived with us (he only wanted westerns or mysteries and would complain loudly if I made the mistake of bringing home a book he had already read!!) and stocking up on biographies and Nancy Drew, Trixie Belden and the Bobbsey Twins, among other things, for myself. I probably read every book in that library at least once! And as I would read about faraway places, I would dream of the day.....some day......that I would be able to visit those places.
Meanwhile, Daddy's cousin Anne, who was a professor of Engish at Winthrop University (then it was Winthrop College, which is also my alma mater), would invite me to visit her during summer terms and would drop me off in the Children's Section of the college library while she taught. More books!! I was in heaven!! And more dreaming of places I hoped one day to visit! Anne would also occasionally travel to Europe during her summer vacations and would bring back souvenirs.....I had an Eiffel Tower and a Venetian gondola on my charm bracelet! And she would bring more books!!
Even as I was reading of all those faraway places and concocting all sorts of scenarios that would get me there, I don't know that I ever really believed I would actually travel like that. I think that somewhere deep inside, I knew that I was just dreaming.....that a shy little bookworm like me would never really get to visit all those places. But still I dreamed.
And then I grew up.....and got married, in what I still think was the most beautiful wedding ever, to a wonderful man. He was from "the big city" (Columbia, the capital city of our state) and we moved to the suburbs of the big city. I continued reading, taught high school English, and fully expected that we would live in Columbia forever. We used to watch "The Love Boat" on TV and dream together of the day we would take a cruise and I thought maybe that would be the way my travel dreams would be fulfilled.
But we didn't stay in Columbia forever. We have moved......a LOT!! My sweet husband, whose educational background is civil engineering and who worked in an architectural firm when we first married, took a job as a "building and grounds manager" for a large insurance company in the late '70s, following massive layoffs at the architectural firm. Part of that job involved being responsible for all the company's telephone equipment, which led him in 1984 to accept a position with an interconnect phone company in Charlotte, NC. Turns out he's really good at this telecommunications stuff, which has led to many other job offers that we couldn't refuse, which is how we've done all this moving around the country. He's very well-respected and sought after in the low-voltage data industry, which makes me very proud of him.
All the moving around has had its challenges. It's not easy to uproot your family, say good-bye to friends and your comfort zone and start over. But it really has been a wonderful life, in spite of the challenges! We have met so many wonderful people, made dear friends in so many parts of the country, and one of the great benefits has been the fulfillment of so many of my travel dreams!
We've experienced so much of the beauty and diversity that is the USA......from our native South Carolina to the rugged Rocky Mountains of Colorado, then to the shoreline of Connecticut (which I still believe is one of the most beautiful places on earth in the fall!), on to the "tundra" of Minnesota, to the sunshine of Florida, and now back almost full circle to the mountains of North Carolina just a short distance from where I grew up. Just in the moving around, we have journeyed many miles......."come a long way."
And in the journeying, we have visited so many of the places I once only dreamed of visiting.....and although I have never ridden (yet) in a Venetian gondola, I have been to the top of the Eiffel Tower! Paris is on my list of favorite cities.......along with London, Edinburgh, York, Montreal, Quebec City, Sydney, Melbourne, Zurich......I've come a long way!
Many of these cities I would love to visit again....and again and again. And I still have cities I would love to see.....quite a long list actually. I've come a long way, but I'm not done yet!
Monday, January 4, 2010
Waiting
Waiting is not something I do well. That could probably be said of most Americans. We are, in general, a very impatient society. We want everything.......and I do mean everything......instantly! The often-used term "microwave society" is certainly appropriate as instant gratification is the theme of everything about our society. But this morning I was struck in my quiet time by how often I came across the word "wait".
I freely admit to being a not-particularly-patient person. I confess that I more often than not am wrapped up in a "want what I want when I want it" mindset. That I more often than not have a "just do it" attitude. That I am not particularly tolerant when there is any delay at all in responding to what I have expressed as something I want done......except, of course, when it comes to my grandchildren! I am far more patient where they are concerned!!!
But this morning I find myself pondering that word "wait", feeling very aware that there's a lesson for me to learn here! In fact, I find myself living that very lesson out as I have to wait for so many things these days........someone to bring my coffee (try hopping across the room on one foot with a cup of coffee in your hand!!) or to fix my meals or to help me with so many of the little "ordinary" tasks of life. And I'm learning to cope and to find creative solutions for these challenges.
The lesson goes far deeper I think. As I have read just this morning so many verses and so much devotional commentary focused on this one concept, I know there's much more to this waiting thing than just learning to be patient if my coffee is delayed a few minutes! One author described the "waiting for the Lord" this way....."an eager anticipation to see what the Lord has in store for this day, looking for opportunities to live for the Lord today." He was writing a devotional thought on these verses in Psalm 130....."I wait for the Lord, my soul waits and in His Word do I hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than those who watch for the morning."
So, as I am waiting.....for the snow to stop, for my ankle to heal, for the coffee to be ready, for whatever, my prayer is that I will be eagerly anticipating what the Lord has in store for this day. That I will be attentive to what He is trying to teach me. That I will be obedient to whatever He says. And I am reminded that time spent in God's waiting room is never wasted time.
"but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." (Isaiah 40:31)
I freely admit to being a not-particularly-patient person. I confess that I more often than not am wrapped up in a "want what I want when I want it" mindset. That I more often than not have a "just do it" attitude. That I am not particularly tolerant when there is any delay at all in responding to what I have expressed as something I want done......except, of course, when it comes to my grandchildren! I am far more patient where they are concerned!!!
But this morning I find myself pondering that word "wait", feeling very aware that there's a lesson for me to learn here! In fact, I find myself living that very lesson out as I have to wait for so many things these days........someone to bring my coffee (try hopping across the room on one foot with a cup of coffee in your hand!!) or to fix my meals or to help me with so many of the little "ordinary" tasks of life. And I'm learning to cope and to find creative solutions for these challenges.
The lesson goes far deeper I think. As I have read just this morning so many verses and so much devotional commentary focused on this one concept, I know there's much more to this waiting thing than just learning to be patient if my coffee is delayed a few minutes! One author described the "waiting for the Lord" this way....."an eager anticipation to see what the Lord has in store for this day, looking for opportunities to live for the Lord today." He was writing a devotional thought on these verses in Psalm 130....."I wait for the Lord, my soul waits and in His Word do I hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than those who watch for the morning."
So, as I am waiting.....for the snow to stop, for my ankle to heal, for the coffee to be ready, for whatever, my prayer is that I will be eagerly anticipating what the Lord has in store for this day. That I will be attentive to what He is trying to teach me. That I will be obedient to whatever He says. And I am reminded that time spent in God's waiting room is never wasted time.
"but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." (Isaiah 40:31)
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Sitting Again
It's been a little more than a year since I launched this journey into the blogosphere and titled it my "Sitting Room" as a tribute of sorts to the amount of time I had spent "sitting" while recovering from a broken ankle. I started with the grand goal of sitting and listening for what God would have to say to me in the days and weeks of the new year. What evolved over time has been a journal of sorts of what God has taught me through the every day circumstances of my life, what He has said to me through His Word, as well as a place to "vent" when life was less than I would like it to be or a place to note observations about life. One thing that as remained constant is that I am sitting. Now that I am in recovery from ankle surgery (yes, same ankle!), I find myself once again sitting. And as I sit, I continue to listen for what God might have to say to me. What lessons do I need to learn? What insights will I glean as I spend time in His Word?
I truly believe that there is purpose in all things and that God has a plan for me even in this time of inactivity. The fact that I am not particularly mobile at the moment only gives me greater opportunity to listen closely and hear what He has to say, to be in preparation for whatever there is for me to do once I am mobile again. So my hope is that I will be a good listener, that I will use the time wisely, that the words of the Psalmist might be mine as well......"So teach us to number our days that we may present to Thee a heart of wisdom."
And as I begin this new decade, the words of Oswald Chambers (in My Utmost for His Highest) are my words as well........"My determined purpose is to be my utmost for His highest, my best for His glory. To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will....of absolute and irrevocable surrender. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone."
I truly believe that there is purpose in all things and that God has a plan for me even in this time of inactivity. The fact that I am not particularly mobile at the moment only gives me greater opportunity to listen closely and hear what He has to say, to be in preparation for whatever there is for me to do once I am mobile again. So my hope is that I will be a good listener, that I will use the time wisely, that the words of the Psalmist might be mine as well......"So teach us to number our days that we may present to Thee a heart of wisdom."
And as I begin this new decade, the words of Oswald Chambers (in My Utmost for His Highest) are my words as well........"My determined purpose is to be my utmost for His highest, my best for His glory. To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will....of absolute and irrevocable surrender. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone."
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