This is a month of anniversaries in our family.
Today Brian and Emily celebrate 10 years of marriage.
Anniversaries are wonderful times of celebration. They are also time to reflect. To remember. To remember why you loved each other in the first place. To remember why you wanted to marry that person. To remember what's really important in your relationship. In the busyness and stress that is life, it's important to take time to remember those things. To reconnect.
In part, that's what our years of parenting were about.......modeling for these now-adult, now-married children what marriage and love and commitment are all about.
Several years ago one of our boys (and I forget which one!) said to Al, "You and mom seem to have more fun now that we're married." Al's response was something like this: "Well, of course we do. The pressure's off."
That was a light-hearted response, but a true one. The pressure is off! Our job as their parents was to get them ready for life in the real world. To prepare them to leave the nest, to "fly" on their own. And whether any of us wants to admit it or not, there's some pressure there!
Our boys have left the nest. They have nests of their own where they are doing quite well. Now the responsibility, the pressure that comes with parenting, is on their shoulders, theirs and their wives'.
As parents, we did the best we knew how to do. To love them unconditionally. To teach them responsibility. To teach them about Jesus. To teach them to love God, His Word and His ways. To prepare them for life. Did we always get everything right? Of course not. But we did our best.
And now our job is done. Or is it? We are no longer responsible for them in the same way we were when they were younger. As adults, they are each now responsible for the choices they make and must live with the consequences of those choices, whatever they may be. But our job is really never done. Now that they are adults, now that they are the parents, we still have the responsibility and the privilege of praying for them, encouraging them, being available to them. Parenting really never stops!
I'm not sure I'm a big fan of the term "empty nest". But, like the term or not, our nest is empty. Just us old folks here. And a dog, but she's getting old too!
Our nest is empty. Our boys and their families live pretty far away, so we are very seldom all in the same place at the same time. On those rare occasions when that does happen, what joy it is to this mother's heart! How I look forward to those occasions!
The nest may be empty in a physical sense, yet at the same time it's still full. It's full of love for those sons, for the daughters they brought into our lives, and for those precious grandsons who light up our world. It's full of joy and memories.
And there's always room in the nest for them to come home. To visit.
"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord." (Psalm 127:3 ESV)
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